Timepass

• Wife: I wish I was a newspaper, so I'd be in ur hands all day. Husband: I too wish that u were a newspaper, so I cud have a new one everyday.

• Sincere Apology: If u dont like any of my SMS n dont like 2 read, then plz dont hesitate, feel free to..... throw ur mobile!!

• I’ve written nice poem 4 you. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.. You should Know What you R.. & Once you Know What you R.. Mental Hospital is not So Far..

• Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...

• A reasent studdi haz shon dat peepal hoo aar werry samaarat end gudd lukeeng mak manee spallings misstake... Vatt iz yorr opeeneum?

• God thought that since he couldn't be everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.

• Little birdy in the sky, You look up and it shits in your eye. You don't mind and you don't cry, You just thank God that cows don't fly.

What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."

• There are 4 animal species a woman needs in her life: Jaguar in her garage, mink in her closet, tiger in her bed and of course a donkey to pay her bills!!

• Do you take me 2 be ur lawfully loveable fren, 2 have and 2 hold, 4 rich quotes or corny jokes, in text messaging & in poor signal, till low battery do us part?

• God made Coke, God made Pepsi, God made ME, so damm SEXY! God made rivers, God made LAKES, God made U, well everybody makes MISTAKES!!

• A small kid wrote to SANTA CLAUSE, "send me a brother". Santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".

• Hearts could only love 4 a while u can put many relations in a file, u can make a desert from the Nile, but u can’t stop my smile when I c ur name on my phone.

• U may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart. U may be out of my reach, but not out of my mind. I may mean nothing to u but u'll always be special to me.